Parker Family Blog

For all of you wondering what we're up to...

Sunday, May 30, 2010

The why to why i run

So, i've had a lot of people question me about running and even at times i've had people make fun of me for wanting to run a marathon. I understand that not everyone enjoys running and that it takes some effort to leave the comfort of the couch sometimes so it's not for everyone. But to be honest running has been a lifesaver to me this year. It has been more than a workout. It has been the one constance, the one control that i have had.

Last November the doctors found a tumor in my neck. They explained that it was probably the reason to why we haven't been able to get pregnant. We've been trying to get pregnant for the last year and a half and it just hasn't happened yet. It has been really discouraging for me but i was excited to get the tumor removed because then i had a hope that it would solve the infertility.

New Years eve i went in for surgery. Everything went well and they were able to remove the tumor without any problems. It came back as non-cancerous so that was a relief. They did tell me though that i would gain a lot of weight because the tumor was what was causing me to not be able to gain weight at all.

With the frustration of a job whose management style was a little less appealing to me, and just finding out about infertility and tumor problems i started the year quite discouraged. Everything just came to an emotional breaking point. For me to get over it i turned to running. It was the one thing i could control. I couldn't control the fact that i wasn't getting pregnant, or that i had to go to a job every day whose management was quite confrontational. I couldn't even control the 15 pounds that i suddenly gained after the surgery, but i could control how far i ran everyday. My mind did have control over my body. Maybe i'm not the fastest runner in the world but to me it was liberating every time i ran.

I'm now finishing up the final two weeks before my marathon. It has been a growing experience as i've pushed my body past it's point of comfort and have allowed my mind to take control. I'm excited for the marathon. I'm excited for everything i've worked so hard for to come to a close.

Running has really been a lifesaver because it has given me a goal, something to work towards as i've felt for the past year that i've had no control over anything else in my life. I've never been a runner but i know now why i'll never stop running. Running didn't change my medical problems that still stem from my thyroid. I didn't suddenly get pregnant. I still get super frustrated with my job at times, but i'm happy. It's helped me live through it all.

Growing up, when we would complain, my mom would always quote a poem to us. She would only quote a portion of it though so i decided to look it up and read the full poem. It moved me so much i thought i'd share

Today upon a bus I saw
A girl with golden hair;
She seemed so gay, I envied her,
And wish that I were half so fair;
I watched her as she rose to leave,
And saw her hobble down the aisle.
She had one leg and wore a crutch,
But as she passed--a smile.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine;
I have two legs--the world is mine.

Later on I bought some sweets.
The boy who sold them had such charm,
I thought I'd stop and talk awhile.
If I were late, t'would do no harm.
And as we talked he said,
"Thank you, sir, you've really been so kind.
It's nice to talk to folks like you
Because, you see, I'm blind"
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine;
I have two eyes--the world is mine

Later, walking down the street,
I met a boy with eyes so blue.
But he stood and watched the others play;
It seemed he knew not what to do.
I paused, and then I said,
"Why don't you join the others, dear?"
But he looked straight ahead without a word,
And then I knew, he couldn't hear.
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine;
I have two ears--the world is mine.

Two legs to take me where I go,
Two eyes to see the sunset's glow,
Two ears to hear all I should know,
Oh, God, forgive me when I whine;
I'm blest, indeed, the world is mine.

Written by Dr. Tennyson Guyer

I'm so grateful for my health that God has given me. For the gift of running that has helped me through this year.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

My Grandma Stannard

Yesterday my grandma passed away. We sat around remembering her life and the person she is. I was shocked to learn new things about her. She was amazing. She was a convert to the church. When she prayed and knew the church was true she then gave her life to it. She served numerous missions including in Nauvoo and Salt Lake. She was such a wonderful example of finding truth and holding on to it. She met my grandpa at a young age and dispite what everyone said she married him. They were told it would never last but they grew old together, still madly in love. Her sweetheart passed away almost a year to the day that she did. They are both now living their happily ever after and i couldn't be happier for them both. I'm sure they are doing what they both love most, and what they did for so many years, sharing their testimonies with others. I'm so glad that the gospel gives us this hope, this knowledge that things are not over when our earthly bodies are laid to rest.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Alex has been a busy busy bee

So, for those of you who didn't know Alex my man has been busy with his new business Skimmit. It's an amazing idea, and so i'm super excited for him! Basically it's coupons that you access via text messaging. He has been working really hard to get a lot of companies to sign up and it's really coming along. All he needs now are more consumers to show the businesses that this is what people want. So if you get unlimited texts and you want to save some money go to and sign up. We are loving the free deals on there! It's completely free for the consumers so don't think it will cost you a cent! Check it out and help support my hubby!!!

You've got to love the mish!

Today I spent a good afternoon reminiscing about my mission. We had a great stake conference that just brought me back to memories and people from my mission. I starting thinking how i really want to go through my missionary journal but the thought kinda scared me. I was so dedicated on my mission and i feel like i've lost the spark. I never wanted to be that person. Sure i still have a testimony, I'm not going off the deep end so don't get me wrong. It's just on the mission the gospel is your life and you promise yourself a million times that you will keep it going. It's hard to explain and easy to know what i'm talking about if you've served a mission. I've just got a long way to go. But if i could get back to the person i was during the mission that would be a good start. 

I posted this picture of me because i feel like this was the Hermana Jensen i remember and love. I didn't care about wordly things. Heck it was a good day when i actually did my hair instead of pulling it back in a pony tail after hoping out of the shower ;) I loved riding my bike because i felt like i was working harder and i didn't have any down time. And mostly i was just all about other people and their needs before my own. This seems to be such a selfish period of my life. I want to find something to help me give up myself again and dive into other people and their needs. If only we could get prego, ha ha, i think that would be a good start because what mom can really think too much about herself? They are some of the most unselfish people i know. Sure you can find those selfish ones but not the women i surround myself with. 

So, here's going back to who i was so that i can find who i truly am...